So six months have passed since I started a new chapter in my life. Six months have passed only and it’s interesting the experiences I have been through already. Some good some bad. Some adjustments had to be made.
Some changes had to occur. Some adapting there was no running away from. Some choices were made; some were right and some not so right. Some lessons were learned and some yet to be learned. Some mistakes were made and continue to make. That’s when I say to myself: ” Will I ever learn? ”
The question that everyone asks. The most annoying one that I might add is: “do you have a boyfriend?” Or variations of it like: “Do you have a significant other” or “are you married” or “are you seeing someone?” How about this for an answer. None of your business.
Maybe that’s too harsh of me, but isn’t it a bit of a personal question. Especially if I just met you, you think I’m gonna start telling you all about my PRIVATE love life. Even when you think it’s a conversation starter; for God’s sake please ask a different question. I get when men ask that question. Usually they wanna know how much of a challenge they have to get you. You notice how I don’t say: to see if you are available or not. That is because it doesn’t matter what you tell them, they hear something totally different. Their brain works differently. You can be telling them you are married with kids and they will still make a pass at you.
I apologize if I am generalizing and making it sound like all men do that. In fact there are gentlemen out there, really sweet and respectful ….. but they are rare these days. I’m sorry to say that.
In my current life, and in my job, I meet lots of new people everyday; lots of men and women that I have never met before whether to work with or for. And in my experiences I was amazed at how men and women interact when they are in a confined space. It’s like there is no concept of personal space whether physically or verbally. Everything goes, everything is “normal”. But it isn’t. My privacy is invaded everyday. I get “accidentally” touched – oops tight space …. I get asked questions about me and my life with the pretense of “let’s get to know each other better since we are working together”. But do we really need to ask sensitive questions that maybe some of us don’t wanna answer. And the thing is, it’s not just one or ten people that do this; it’s everybody. It almost makes me feel like I’m the abnormal one. But I know I’m not. How come I never ask these questions. How come I understand the difference between someone I’m comfortable talking with and sharing stories and someone that I only know for a whole of 5 minutes. Do people even get that concept? I wonder.
Now that I vented a little, I can move on to a more productive topic. It’s not like me to write like that. But this subject bothers me so much that I had to share my feelings with my readers.
Part of my adjustment in a new country and culture involves understanding how people think and why do they say what they say and do what they do. It is not easy to adapt to a new environment in every way. It is challenging, sometimes scary, and at times depressing.
I can look back now at the past six months of my life and see all the changes I had to go through. I knew that I was going to learn new lessons and grow as a person but what I did not expect of myself is to go a couple steps back. Yes, I did. As much as I was taking steps forward in one aspect of my life, I went a little backwards in another. I lost myself a bit along the way. But I thank God that he sends me ANGELS that put me back on the right track.
My family and my best friends back home and my new found friends in my new life, they have all been my rock one way or another. I couldn’t have survived without them. So I thank them from the bottom of my heart. They will know who they are as they read this post.
I cannot sum up all my challenges, downfalls and lessons learned all in one post. It is an ongoing process that I would like to share. Maybe someone out there going through something similar might benefit from a thing or two I might say. At least I hope so.
So my plan is to create a series of Lessons Learned over the next period. I’m not sure how far this will take me but let’s see. I will write about things I faced and had to overcome and the big lesson behind it. I want to share that with you my readers. Thank you for continuing to support me, for following my posts, for sending me comments of encouragement and above all for being there to listen. Thank you.