The “NEVER” Lesson

How many times have we heard the saying ‘Never say Never’ and how many times have we said: “I will never …. ” And let us now count, out of all the times we said ‘never’, how many of them we actually ended up doing or feeling or experiencing whatever it is we said NEVER to.

I will be the first one to admit it. And you know what. I still do it; knowing that I have already failed at keeping my ‘never’ as a ‘NEVER’. Maybe it’s just habit. I don’t know. Maybe we can’t help ourselves. Maybe we are weak. Maybe we test ourselves to the maximum limits to the point of getting to the Nevers. Maybe, and that’s more like my take on it, that when we put limitations to ourselves, like a border we cannot cross, we seem to wanna do it even more just because its forbidden. Even though the Nevers are things that WE put in place. So what are we fighting against? Ourselves? I mean seriously, why bother say: ” I would never ….” When you know deep down you are going to do it anyway. And Ofcourse we ‘never’ realize that we are doing it until way down the road after shit had hit the fan. Excuse my language.

It’s easier to blame the whole world around us including other people or circumstances or oh I love this one ‘fate’. And when we don’t know what else to say. It’s God. He wanted us to go through that. Maybe it’s true, maybe God IS trying to teach us a lesson. Who am I to say anything. However, I still think that our choices led us to making our Nevers a REALITY.

There is a taste to making the impossible possible. Those who have conquered, know what I am talking about. I believe there is a taste in testing our Nevers. And I am not saying every single never we have done. But we most definitely have done quite a bit of them. You don’t believe me. Take a minute and think back, you must have said “I will never do …., or I will never feel like …., or I will never allow ….., etc.”

That’s when I am in your face and telling you: “Yes you have and here is the proof”. Ouch. Your answer will be priceless – because I do it too. All you can say is: “Oh” And that’s it. That’s all you will say. Maybe accompanied by an embarrassed smile if you are handling it courageously. Or may be you are bitter about it and the next five minutes or more will be a one way conversation about how it was not your fault and it just happened that way. Come on, you know I am right. That really does happen. Even I did that. It’s funny sometimes listening to yourself making excuses and not wanting to take responsibility for your own actions. I gotta laugh at myself sometimes. You should do it too.

So, here I am babbling on about the Never experience. Trust me I am relating this to my lessons at this point in my life. In my lifetime, so far, I have made quite a bit of my NEVERS a reality, some were tragic and some were positively life changing. I knew what I was doing but I just became more aware of it now because I have done more Nevers in a short period of time, that it woke me up and I had to face myself with the reality.

I now know the best way to live my life – that is ‘Not to say the word Never’. Because apparently I am a magnet to it. I say ‘never’ from here and it’s happening the next day. Well maybe not literally the next day. You know what I mean.

At times, I remember something my Mom used to say to me and still says. Especially when I argue with her about having to live life and experiencing everything, even if someone else knows it is not good for you. She would say: “why would you put your hand in the fire knowing it will burn you?” And she is right. I will not deny that. Sometimes it is too obvious. Other times, I gotta learn the hard way I guess. I will not learn the real lesson unless I am really burned. We still haven’t agreed about this point till this day. Sorry Mom. But I still Love you.

My conclusion to one of my life lessons is summed up as follows:
– Do not use the ‘N’ word anymore. Don’t even say it. It’s a curse.
– Be true to yourself, follow your instincts
– Take responsibility for your own actions, you got there because of only one person YOU
– Deal with the consequences no matter how difficult or embarrassing they may seem
– Learn from your mistakes but if you shall repeat them (and most likely you will) try to have a different outcome next time around. You might just get it at some point.

I may be humorous, but it is a serious subject. Be careful what you think about even in your day dreams. The power of your thoughts may attract things in your life even when you really do not want them. Focus on being positive and on the things you do want and do not put attention on what you do not want. Many of you may recognize that I am only repeating what the ‘Secret’ shared with us. If only we act as much as we listen. Or in this instance, Read.

Good luck to all!

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