Once upon a time

Have you ever met someone once upon a time, or have you ever been someone once upon a time – where people always said: “oh you are such a sweetheart!! How nice!”  Then time passes, you meet the same person, or even yourself, that’s when people comment: “oh my god she is such a bitch! What’s wrong with her?”

It’s interesting how people change. It is expected nonetheless.  It is very sad that a lot of the change, unfortunately, is to the worse. Who is to blame here? Or is it just life? Yes, life does influence us in being a certain way around others. We could have been the sweetest, but with so much abuse, and bad treatment, we have no choice but to grow a tough skin and come across as mean,rude and selfish. That is in fact our way of protecting ourselves from being walked on by every Joe and Harry out there. Excuse my selection of names but it’s just for example purposes. But seriously, how do we change from being a sweetheart to a total bitch, from a nice man to an asshole. Excuse my language, but it must be said.

That is the point I would like to discuss today. Apart from the sweetheart and the nice man, people in general are changing and it is necessary to understand why we are changing at this rapid rate. And how if possible to bring ourselves back before it is too late.

People change with life experiences; that is true. We all go through so much trials and tribulations. We get tested time and time again. Our strength is put to the test, our faith is put to the test, our principles, morals and values are all put to the test. Our manners and upbringing gets put to the test. I cannot think of anything that escapes being tested. Really!!!  The things we go through breaks us at times, but other times it makes us stronger. That’s when I recall a quote that gets repeated regularly: “what doesn’t break you makes you stronger”. But is it always the case?

Do you see yourself stronger by stooping to a lower level, by seeking revenge, by doing unto others as they have done to you, by following in the footsteps of evil actions, by hurting others same way they hurt you, by being mean, by saying hurtful things to protect yourself, by justifying to yourself why you lie, cheat, steal; in other words by undoing every good teaching your parents instilled in you (if that even happened to begin with).  Is that what we call “Strength” to survive in this world. Do you have to have what your brother has? Do you always need to be the best in everything? Are you truly happy after you mess with other people’s lives for your own gain? So you step on everyone and do whatever it takes to be the richest, most famous person who have it all. My question to you is: then what?

No one was born evil. We are born innocent and pure, we grow older, we grow up, we mature (or not), and we die. That’s our story from beginning to end. What happens in between our birth and our death is what makes your story worth telling or better to forget. Think about it for a minute. Are you living a story to be told or better to be buried and forgotten. Do you wanna live for yourself, by yourself or with others, for others. You make the choice. Are you going to allow Life to change you to a bitter and evil person just to survive in it? OR Are you going to take control of Life and deal with the balls of fire that gets thrown at you without losing yourself in the process? You choose.

Finding the balance in this tough Life we live is not easy by any means. But it’s what will tell your story in the end. Your struggle to remain good and not sell your soul to the devil just to get what you want, and live how you want. Your perseverance to have the goodness you are born with, not only to remain as such, but to grow to a higher level. You understand that seeking life pleasures are only temporary and gets you nowhere in the end.

If anyone understands how difficult life can be, that would be me. But maybe because nothing came easy for me, I had to struggle for everything, and still do; that’s why I understand that getting everything you want in the end means nothing. We are all here with this life we live on borrowed time. We either make the best of it, or the worst of it. But your time will come to an end one day. And the question will remain: is your story worth telling? Is it inspirational? Can it be used as an example?

I don’t want to be remembered as a “beyotch”. I want to be remembered as someone who lived her life to the fullest, the best way she knew how, struggled but never lost herself in the process, always had a good head on her shoulders, led her life with her heart even though it caused her so much pain, gave her all whenever she could, lived, laughed, loved, danced, and made her own music; sometimes happy music, sometimes sad, followed her instincts most of her way, and most of all allowed God to lead her life in whatever direction she was meant to take, even if it brought agony and heartache. But in the end, she lived with an example. And that is how I want to be remembered. None of the materials mean anything to me. No fame or fortune either. Whether I get that promotion or not. Whether I get my house or not. Whether I get that family I dream of or not. I am still Me. None of that defines me. I am what I am and I am proud of who I am.

I talk to you from the heart as always, I ask you to please take the time to ask yourself how do you want to be remembered? What is your legacy? What is really important here? Stop the wants and the needs and focus on the basics. Go back to the roots. Go back to your heart. And if you have strayed away, changed and became someone you don’t recognize anymore, it’s never too late to find yourself again. Ask for help if you need it. Don’t just live for today. Live for the day that your life will be nothing but a memory. What do you want that memory to be?  How do you want to be remembered????

One comment on “Once upon a time

  1. Dear Livingoutmypurpose,

    I find your writings not only thoughtful, but also reflective. It’s funny my recent experience makes me question about being the nice guy. I’m tired of feeling like I’m the one who is getting stepped on (Mr. Nice Guy). To kind of quote you “I want to start getting everything”. Instead of changing into the nice guy, I’ve been struggling with wanting be the asshole. Why, because it seems like the asshole gets the girl, raise or promotion. I do know that “having all the material things” don’t mean anything, but I’m tired of trying the right way & being knocked down. Then I get ashamed of those thoughts, because I try to live “make me ever ready to come to you with clean hands & open eyes, so when life fades, my spirit may come to you without shame.”

    I figure I’ll never be rich or famous, I’ve tried to live it as you wrote “set an example”. I hope to be remembered as a good man, true friend who was there whenever needed. It would be nice to to have a few things turn out right.

    Your statement “We are all here with this life we live on borrowed time” is correct, to me though the way this past year has been I’ve been wishing my borrowed time was shorter.

    In closing I want to tell you that I think you’re a beautiful woman. You are kinds considerate, thoughtful & caring.

    I wish you all the best in the coming New Year. ☺

    Liked by 1 person

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