Your memory lives on

It’s been a year since I have last seen you. I can’t believe it has been so long. Life may have went on without you. But your memory truly lives on.

I write this as the day approaches. I’m very well aware of the last day. And for me, that last day is different than the rest. It’s not the day we buried you. It’s not the day you passed. It’s the last day my eyes saw you, my hands touched you and my ears heard you say my name – all for the last time. I choke in tears as I recall this moment. When I had to leave your room. I looked back at the doorway one last time as you sat in your chair. I wondered for a moment. Could this be my last time?

Indeed, my biggest fear became my worst nightmare. You took your last breath and you left this world when I was miles away. But I did everything in my power to send you off and be part of celebrating your life. This life that you lived. This life that I was so privileged to be a part of.

We can never measure our love for someone whether they are alive or not. Love is just love. It cannot be quantified. Although I recall when I was a little girl, I used to tell you I love you as big as the whole world and all the oceans in it. It didn’t make sense to me then. But it does now. I just love you Grandpa and your love will remain with me until the day I go from this life too.

I think of you often. I remember a line you used to say, a joke you used to make, I hear your laugh in my ears as if you are here. I hear you calling my name. It’s not my imagination, I really hear you.

Thank you for never leaving my side. Thank you for blessing me and always protecting me from the other side. I know you are in bliss now. I just want to tell you I miss you. But don’t worry, my tears will subside. I will be okay I promise. Because I know your love is always there and in my heart, your memory will live on.

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