Every day we face making decisions, some are insignificant, some serious while others; detrimental. Indeed, there is a wide spectrum of decisions that we ultimately make throughout our lives. Each one has the potential to change the course of our lives. While some, we give too much importance to unnecessarily. In this life, we learn ever so patiently when to take things seriously and when to lighten up.
In my personal experience, I noticed I took things more seriously than not. I made a big deal about almost everything. This created a tense and stressful environment for me and those around me. I recently discovered that when I respond rather than react, the decisions I am faced with no longer seem as stressful. When I calm myself down and realize that it’s not the end of the world which decision I make, suddenly a big weight is lifted off my shoulders. It is true that I create stress for myself. I complicate things unnecessarily sometimes. Although, I have taken extreme measures at times, I feel I’m learning to find my balance when making decisions in my life.
It takes practice and deep understanding of yourself, the world around you and the subjects at hand, in order to keep a steady thought process and act from a place of calm and peace. It is when you know that decisions are merely a direction you choose to take at that moment in time, that you relax and act accordingly. But when you are taking a hostile approach towards every decision you are making, big or small, you tend to miss the point of the lesson you are facing in this point in time.
Are you paying attention to the signs? Do you recognize why this is happening now? Do you accept that things are not just happening to you – you attracted it at times – other times it is a result of a previous action or decision taken that you never anticipated or simply weren’t aware of its consequences? What if you are facing something that is contributing to your growth? Did you ever allow yourself to look at it from that perspective? Why do you assume that the world is out to get you and you are in a constant battle, overcoming obstacles and hurdles?
Isn’t it beautiful if you saw life as a school in which things happen along the way to teach us what we needed to learn, to give us the tools we need for the next lesson? What if we switch our views regarding our decisions as an opportunity to apply the knowledge and lessons learned from previous experiences? What if we embraced those tough decisions and had fun with them along the way? Why do we take things so seriously and make it a chore or an obligation, rather than a journey to be enjoyed?
Undoubtedly, there are those decisions that seem like they are the end of the world for us. But they aren’t. We make them that way because of the limitations we impose on ourselves. We look at our circumstances as the end all – be all. We don’t see beyond our troubles and hardships. We are so focused on solving our problems with the same tools that got us there from the first place. We become stuck in our minds. And we block any intuition that comes because we are depending on our brain to do the right thinking. We are blinded to the signs that show up in the middle of our crisis because we are convinced blessings are not for our likes.
We fall down a spiral and the doom we predicted occurs, confirming our assumptions and limiting beliefs: “I am unlucky,” we say. “This always happens to me,” “I’m never gonna be happy, I’m jinxed.” “Life is difficult and I’m gonna suffer for the rest of my life because this is my destiny.”
That’s the story we keep telling ourselves. It’s what we choose to believe and say out loud. Therefore, the universe responds by providing you with what you stated. Every statement you make about yourself and your life manifests in the way you feel about it. You are the creator of our own life. When you choose to view your life from the lens of ‘problems seem to follow me, I will never be happy’, that’s what you will get.
Make a decision for once in your life to change the way you see yourself and things around you. Make a choice to be happy …. period. Make a choice to love life and all the experiences it brings your way. Make a choice to love yourself and accept that everything that happens is there to teach you and make you stronger, even if you lose things and people along the way.
Make this decision – the most important decision of your life. Decide that you want to live the best way you know how. Decide to have faith in the universe, God, whatever you choose. Decide to look at things differently and see how it changes your life. Notice your blessings. Recognize the good in your life. Be aware that challenges are a natural part of life, not because you are jinxed.
Without troubles, we don’t grow, because we don’t get shaken from our comfort zone. Welcome those troubles, welcome those tough decisions – they are your blessings – not your curse.
As for the smaller decisions, lighten up about it. What does it matter which shirt you wear today? Who cares the laundry was not done yesterday? So what your car has a scratch on the bumper? Is it really a big deal you missed your bus and was running a little late? Cook whatever you have in the fridge, order take out for today if you have to. You got a lower mark on your exam than you would have liked – didn’t you do your best?
The list goes on and on. The point here is to recognize the difference between the big things and the small things that don’t deserve you stressing and getting sick over it. You will eliminate a lot of ‘unnecessary fights’ with your partner, your children, your co-worker, your neighbor and ultimately, yourself.
Yes … Haven’t you noticed the one you ‘fight’ with the most is YOU? Who are you most unsatisfied with? Who are you most hard on? Who do you have the highest expectations from? Who do you blame when things go wrong? Who do you punish the most? Hasn’t it always been YOU?
It’s time you stop doing that. It’s time you love, appreciate and value yourself. It’s time you know this: ‘you are doing the best you can – with what you know now.’ It’s time you put your head up and be proud of everything you accomplished – big or small. It’s time you let go of all the doubts and all the limiting beliefs that held you back up until this moment. It’s time to look forward and move on. Above all, it’s time to live this moment, right here, right now, knowing you are just fine and everything will work out the way it will. Take a deep breath, hold it in for 1,2,3,4,5 and release slowly until you empty out your breath. Close your eyes for a few seconds and feel your heart beating. You are well. Remember that. I send you Blessings, Love and Peace.